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where’s the SOAP?

SOAP’s been a struggle as of late.  There’s always a battle between legalism and license.  It seems to be the plight of religion.  For me, the pendulum swings freely, I confess.  Despite my best efforts, SOAP became a matter of legalism for me.  Pride when I do well.  Shame when I do not.  Neither of which come from God. In my frustration with that I set SOAP down for a good long while.  Now, I’ve continued to do daily devotions, but the steps and the blogging have gone away.  There have been mixed results.

Conceptually, however, I think SOAP is a beautiful thing!  So now what?  I’ve wrestled with that a lot.  I love the accountability of blogging devotions, and the resource that having my daily devotions recorded and organized have proven to be.  At the same time, I struggle with the sustainability of it all.

So, here’s my latest approach: I’m going to SOAP once a week, and do so on my personal blog.  I’ll simply write about what’s stood to me the most in the past week of devotions.

It feels like a good compromise.  It should be sustainable, and still be a source of accountability.  We’ll see.

tithing, and Legion

Scripture:

July 30: 2 Chronicles 31-32, Psalm 26, Mark 5

Observation:

“Since they began to bring the contributions into the house of the Lord, we have eaten and had enough and have plenty left, for the Lord has blessed his people, so that we have this large amount left.”

Tithing works.  Now, i believe that we, this side of the cross, are to use tithing as a guideline, and not a legalistic standard–I also believe that the great commission calls us to give more radically, not less.  That being said…tithing works.  the point of giving to the church isn’t primarily to sustain the operations of the church, and to pay the ministers.  Those things are part of it…but just a part.  If the Church of today would tithe faithfully, those needs would be met, and there would then be “a large amount left.”  The church has failed, I”m afraid, in the areas of social justice and in proclaiming the gospel.  That’s where the lion’s share is to go, after the needs of the church’s basic function are met, there should be a great deal left over.

18 As he was getting into the boat, the man who had been possessed with demons begged him that he might be with him. 19 And he did not permit him but said to him, “Go home to your friends and tell them how much the Lord has done for you, and how he has had mercy on you.” 20 And he went away and began to proclaim in the Decapolis how much Jesus had done for him, and everyone marveled.

I love this entire story.  It’s exciting!  There are a lot stories about demon possession in the Bible, but this one is by far the most dramatic.  Most of the really creepy stuff about demon possession is found here–i think our mindset about demon possession might be very different were it not for this passage (and a lot of bad slasher movies).  But it’s the part at the end that always catches my attention.  It’s so interesting that Jesus didn’t allow him to come along with him.  If you think about it, that would have been the easier route for the former demoniac.  Back home he was the freak…probably a string of wounded people in his wake…but that’s where Jesus sent him, right back where he came from.  And all he is armed with, as far as theology goes, is his own story.  I think that’s interesting, too.  And finally, I think that this story, and the story of the woman the well, might just be the key to unlocking a biblical mystery.  I often wonder, “why did Jesus tell people to keep quiet about what he’d done for them?”  But that’s only in the case of ‘signs and wonders’–but in the cases of grace and salvation, he sends them out to tell everyone!  I don’t think Jesus wanted a crowd full of miracle-seekers…he was looking for people who knew they needed a savior–not a magician.

Application:

uhm…I”ve got one more reason to teach generosity and faithful giving!  One more reason to practice it myself!  And secondly, I’m reminded that in the end, all I really need is my story.  there’s value in the seeking the other answers, great value, but in the final analysis, I don’t HAVE to know anything more than what Jesus has done for me.  It’ll translate just fine!

Prayer:

Lord, help me to teach stewardship boldly, always–and don’t let my fear of being one of those greasy TV guys, ever keep me from teaching the part that actually is Biblical.  And secondly, help me to simply go ans share my story, and encourage others to do the same.  If I only know what You’ve done for me–I’ve got enough material to talk forever!

I am yours.

Amen.

The WHY of salvation

Scripture:

July 29: 2 Chronicles 29-30, Psalm 25, Mark 4

Observation:

11 For your name’s sake, O Lord,
pardon my guilt, for it is great.

So this Psalm weaves in and out of an ongoing conversation in my head connected to the “why” of salvation.  Why does God offer us life, anyway?  It’s not because we’ve earned it, that much is clear.  Painfully clear.  The above verse points out what appears to me to be the most theologically sound answer: he saves us for the sake of his name.  It’s for his glory.  His name.  Not mine.  Now, as a bonus, my name gets transferred from worthless gunk, into the righteousness of Christ–and there’s the whole eternal life rather than eternal death thing, which is pretty huge, too.  But that’s all secondary.  That’s right, secondary.  I exist for the sake of his name, my salvation is first and foremost for the sake of his name.  This is his deal, not my deal.  He’s the hero, i’m the bum who got snatched from the jaws of death.

And at the same time…thank God for the secondary stuff!

16 Turn to me and be gracious to me,
for I am lonely and afflicted.
17 The troubles of my heart are enlarged;
bring me out of my distresses.
18 Consider my affliction and my trouble,
and forgive all my sins.

Now the Psalmist has called out to God to save for the sake of the Lord’s name (vs.11), and now he’s clearly asking for salvation for his own name’s sake.  Is that wrong?  No!  the secondary stuff is great stuff, too–and should be sought.

But my struggle comes in trying to keep the two in the right order.  My struggle is in remembering that my blessing–though great–is secondary.  That if i”m seeking “all these things” rather than his kingdom first, then I’ve missed the point altogether.  That God didn’t save me to bless me.  That on the truest plain, my salvation isn’t even about me.  It’s about God getting the glory for rescuing the bum.  And is sure is great to be that bum!

Application:

Perspective! Perspective!  Perspective!  My application is to remember, all day long, that this deal isn’t about me, and it’s not about things working out well for me…it’s about the glory of God.  And if, God’s best glorified by things going well for me, then bring it on!  However, if his name is brought the most glory by me being shamed and broken and struggling for every last inch….then (gulp) bring that on, too!

Prayer:

I am yours.  I am not my own.  Not my will, but yours be done.  Not my will, but yours be done.

amen.

His strength is made perfect in my weakness

Scripture:

July 28: 2 Chronicles 26-28, Psalm 24, Mark 3

Observation:

16 But when he was strong, he grew proud, to his destruction.

I’ve been growing increasingly aware of my own pride as of late.  It reeks.  I’ve been catching myself being a know-it-all (most often catching it in my mind before it slips out of my mouth…but it doesn’t make any difference at all–it just means that I have sophisticated filtering system).  I’ve been catching myself judging people for being judgmental.  That’s a bitter irony.  I’ve found myself rolling the eyes of my heart to people with good intentions who just happen to be mistaken.  How many opportunities did Jesus have to roll his eyes at the dizzying ignorance that surrounded him (and still does!), yet he always showed mercy and love and patience.  I’ve caught myself thinking my opinions were something more than that…and liking the sound of them, too.  It’s just pride–the nasty ole nemesis who pops up like weed every time it’s left unchecked for even a moment.  I wish I could get it by the root.

This past Sunday at church, during the singing of one my very favorites songs (Everything, by Tim Hughes), God gave me just a tiny glimpse of my own weakness, and I just collapsed.  If it weren’t for his moment by moment strength and provision…I’m less than nothing.  I don’t know that I’ve ever felt so weak, so helpless.   Here’s the strange part: it felt wonderful.  That’s right, it was wonderful.  His strength really is made perfect in our weakness.  It felt wonderful, because it felt free.  All the stress and pressure of thinking that I had the ability to do things right and do things well, went away.  There is a joy in knowing that you have absolutely nothing to offer.  In that moment, the pride that enslaves me with the stress of thinking things won’t go forward without me was gone…and I felt the freedom of being totally reliant upon the strength of the Almighty, and not my own.

Then I got up, and left that moment, and the clarity of that moment was gone as quickly as it came.  I think this post is just another attempt to recreate it.  It helps.  But I’ll never forget that moment…when I felt the joy of total frailty.

24:1 The earth is the Lord‘s and the fullness thereof, [8]
the world and those who dwell therein,
2 for he has founded it upon the seas
and established it upon the rivers.

3 Who shall ascend the hill of the Lord?
And who shall stand in his holy place?
4 He who has clean hands and a pure heart,
who does not lift up his soul to what is false
and does not swear deceitfully.
5 He will receive blessing from the Lord
and righteousness from the God of his salvation.
6 Such is the generation of those who seek him,
who seek the face of the God of Jacob. [9] Selah

Application:

I wish I knew.  to remember well.  to submerge myself in the truth again and again.  to rediscover that moment…find a way to stay in it.

Prayer:

Lord, I love you.  Help me to know in my heart what I know if my head.  To trust you alone.  Not myself.  Lord, thank you that your strength is made perfect in my weakness.  I love you!  thank you!

Amen.

VERSE 1:
GOD IN MY LIVING
THERE IN MY BREATHING
GOD IN MY WAKING
GOD IN MY SLEEPING

GOD IN MY RESTING
THERE IN MY WORKING
GOD IN MY THINKING
GOD IN MY SPEAKING

CHORUS:
BE MY EVERYTHING
BE MY EVERYTHING
BE MY EVERYTHING
BE MY EVERYTHING

VERSE 2:
GOD IN MY HOPING
THERE IN MY DREAMING
GOD IN MY WATCHING
GOD IN MY WAITING

GOD IN MY LAUGHING
THERE IN MY WEEPING
GOD IN MY HURTING
GOD IN MY HEALING

BRIDGE:
CHRIST IN ME
CHRIST IN ME
CHRIST IN ME THE HOPE OF GLORY
YOU ARE EVERYTHING

CHRIST IN ME
CHRIST IN ME
CHRIST IN ME THE HOPE OF GLORY
BE MY EVERYTHING

no suds…

SOAP’s on hold for a few more days…

I will post again on July 28th.

Uzzah

Scripture:

July 10: 1 Chronicles 12-13, Psalm 9, Matthew 11

Observation:

9 And when they came to the threshing floor of Chidon, Uzzah put out his hand to take hold of the ark, for the oxen stumbled. 10 And the anger of the Lord was kindled against Uzzah, and he struck him down because he put out his hand to the ark, and he died there before God. 11 And David was angry because the Lord had broken out against Uzzah. And that place is called Perez-uzza [7] to this day. 12 And David was afraid of God that day, and he said, “How can I bring the ark of God home to me?” 13 So David did not take the ark home into the city of David, but took it aside to the house of Obed-edom the Gittite. 14 And the ark of God remained with the household of Obed-edom in his house three months. And the Lord blessed the household of Obed-edom and all that he had.

Ah, the crappy story of Uzzah. I’d rather not try to explain around it like so many preacher-types have…I’ll be honest, this story bothers me–it’s one of those texts that I’d like to highlight with a black marker. But the truth is, we don’t know what else was going on in Uzzah’s life, and we don’t know what happened to Uzzah after his death.

My disdain for this story reveals a lot about me. It shows that I really don’t think sin is a big deal. I’d be OK with this story if Uzzah had a long pattern of gross sin. if God had warned him a few times, maybe I’d feel better about it. But, in the end, I don’t like this story because it doesn’t seem fair…the crime doesn’t seem to merit the punishment. My feeling about this story shows that in my mind, subverting the will of God isn’t a big offense. It shows that I’m still thinking that some people deserve the wrath of God, and others don’t. You know, good people like you and me.

But the truth is, Uzzah got what he deserved. The wages of sin is death. Thank God, I’m not given what I deserve!

Application:

to not scoff or wink at sin, to realize that all sin is an offense to God, punishable by death. And, in turn, to rejoice in the wonder of the Gospel, which declares me to be righteous before God.

Prayer:

Lord, I don’t deserver your grace….I deserve death, eternal death actually. But you show me grace and mercy. You offer me life and victory through the cross. thank you Jesus! Your love is amazing!

In the name of Jesus, Amen.

Give without pay

Scripture:

July 9: 1 Chronicles 11, Psalm 8, Matthew 10

Observation:

You received without paying; give without pay. 9 Acquire no gold nor silver nor copper for your belts, 10 no bag for your journey, nor two tunics [14] nor sandals nor a staff, for the laborer deserves his food.

I have a lot of thoughts about this.  First of all…I love this text because in it, Jesus is sending out the 12 to do the work that he’d been doing.  He tells the to announce the nearness of the Kingdom, and then to demonstrate the power of the Kingdom.  Which is just exactly what Jesus had been doing all along.  Also, worth noting, is that it says that God empowered them to do this work.

the above text catches my eye for a few reasons.  First, it should deter anyone from using ministry to get rich.  That stuff infuriates me!  Jesus himself made it clear that it’s a subversion of his will if we use ministry as a means to line our own pockets.  But he does say that the laborer deserves his food…which means that they were to rely on the ones to whom they were ministering to meet their physical needs…but Jesus made it clear that this was not about accumulating wealth.

But the essence of the text here is (I think) the idea that the truth and it’s power and freedom were given to them as a free gift, and they ought to give it to others  freely in return.  We’ve done absolutely nothing to earn the truth that’s been given to us!  nothing!  But it’s ours by the grace of God.  And we are to share it, freely.  we shouldn’t expect anything in return for it.  Not money, not power, not even respect.  Respect is the biggest one, I think.  I’m afraid that some people teach not to share truth, but to gain respect.  Being a preacher-guy, I must be very careful of that.  i know I”m not gonna get rich off of this deal, I’m fine with that–but the truth is, I want to be respected and appreciated because I teach.  That’s hard to type, because it’s a pretty serious flaw I’m announcing…but it’s true.  That means that I’m hoping to steal a little bit of God’s glory for His truth, and bask in it myself for a bit.

God, change my heart!

Application:

Uhm…I think the application got built into observation.

Prayer

Lord, I love you.   I want to serve you, and I want to do it for the right reasons.  I do seek to steal your glory–i confess, Lord!  It’s true.  I don’t want it to  be.  Lord, change my heart.  Cut out the rot, painful as it may be.  Lord, I want everything I do to reflect your glory, and be for your name’s sake.  And, Lord, please root out any part of me that doesn’t want that.

I love you.  I’m yours.  Not my own.

Amen.

tax collectors and sinners

Scripture:

July 8: 1 Chronicles 9-10, Psalm 7, Matthew 9

Observation:

9 As Jesus passed on from there, he saw a man called Matthew sitting at the tax booth, and he said to him, “Follow me.” And he rose and followed him.

10 And as Jesus [9] reclined at table in the house, behold, many tax collectors and sinners came and were reclining with Jesus and his disciples. 11 And when the Pharisees saw this, they said to his disciples, “Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and sinners?” 12 But when he heard it, he said, “Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick. 13 Go and learn what this means, ‘I desire mercy, and not sacrifice.’ For I came not to call the righteous, but sinners.”

Tax collectors and sinners.  My favorite preacher guy talked about tax collectors and sinners a while back, you can read the message here.  Great stuff–i learned a lot!

I love the image of our God who eats with tax collectors and sinners…historically: the lowest of the low, the most hated, the most scorned.

I lament, however, that i don’t follow that example myself.

Application:

My application is one that I’ve had before, and not followed: to take more intentional steps to be evangelistic and develop more friendships with the unsaved.

Prayer:

Lord, lead me to be more like you.  Show me the opportunities that you give, nad give me the awareness to take advantage of them.  I want to show mercy.

I submit to your leadership.  I love you.

amen

worry. anger.

Check me out!  I’m SOAP’ing for the first time this week!  helluva week, man, helluva week.  Of course, that’s the paradox…these are the weeks I need SOAP the most, but do it the least.  I’m looking forward to the day I learn how to buck that trend.

Scripture:

July 5: 1 Chronicles 6, Psalm 4, Matthew 6

Observation:

4 Be angry, [7] and do not sin;
ponder in your own hearts on your beds, and be silent. Selah

It’s hard to read this verse, and not take time to let it soak in.  It always stops me dead in my tracks as I hastily (all too often) scurry through the text.  What a different world this would be if this commandment were followed.  I’m not one to fly off the handle and lose my temper.  No, I don’t often lose my temper–instead I keep it close, coddling it throughout the day, lending it my strength to keep it around awhile longer.  It doesn’t have much staying power…provided I don’t feed it.  This text says to take some time and ‘think it out’, ponder on it, and then let it go. pretty strong advice.

25 “Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? 26 Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? 27 And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? [14] 28 And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, 29 yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. 30 But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? 31 Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. 33 But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.

34 “Therefore do not be anxious about tomorrow, for tomorrow will be anxious for itself. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble.

I really want to think that I’m not a worrier.  I really do.  But  I can’t convince myself of it.  I don’t pace and wring my hands…I don’t fixate on the negative, or fear the worst.  I just don’t.  I think most people who know me wouldn’t consider me a worrier at all.  But I’m not so sure.  I think my anxiety, rather than concentrating on one situation, just dispels itself evenly throughout my whole life…poisoning it all only slightly.  And then it builds slowly.  It so gradual that I don’t even realize it’s building-to subtle to discern.  And then i head off for a vacation, and about day 4 or 5 I’m myself again, and I realize how far from the real me I am most days.  It’s a pretty horrifying realization, actually.

Application:

well, my first application is to stop coddling anger…that one’s important, but not central in my thoughts.  it’s the second application: to, with the help of the Lord, trust the provision of God…knowing that he’ll care well for me–always!  every night before I go to bed I pray for my son, asking the Lord that my son will know that he’s safe, and to rest easy, because daddy will make sure, no matter what, that he’s safe and that he’ll have all that he needs…always!  The truth is, I’m making a promise that I can’t actually keep–but my heart just can’t keep me from making it again and again, every night.  The same promise is made by God to me, his son.  Only he can keep it.

Prayer:

Lord, I love you.  I love you.  You are so faithful!  Thank you for your amazing provision.  Not just of stuff, but of all things.  You are good.  You are trustworthy.  Praiseworthy.  Help me to trust.  To praise.

I surrender again to you today, Lord.  You are my king.  I am yours.

amen.